whenever I see some beautiful and extraordinary successful girls, I become so envious. why ?
I just can’t comfort myself into the position I have got now. I just can’t stay peace with these beautiful figures
No it is not my fault. it is the society fault. I need to get rid of all the things and still stay focus
so just made up your mind and stay focus!!! you can do it
nowadays, the biggest news in china is definitely the conflict between china and japan. There is a national wide anti-japan movement in china. People protest, anti-japan sentiment is definitely rising boycott japanese product. However, we also see a lot of ugly sides in this movement
Yes, this protest is a symbol of chinese people’s patriotism, however, the violence part also reveals the ugly personality in chinese people. Can we do things in a more civilized,rational and peaceful way?
yes, chinese people has a bad reputation worldwide, we are atheist, we are materialist, we are self-centered nation, and we don’t know how to spell shame and dignity.
It is partially reflected on myself. I am a typical self-centered people. and I am long way after knowing how to spell shame. Now is the time to change. As yesterday’s call, I need to know something, I need to tell myself, there are certain rules in the world, a person should know his/her responsibility instead of just chasing whatever is good for him/her.
Further reflection on my own behavior, I realize that I am not a person who will hurt or harm others simply for my own interest. But I will try best not to
comfort and enjoying is something we all need to learn. great professors and teachers all teach us how to work and how to master skills, but no one teach us how to relax or how to enjoy yourself.
waste resources. I know how to entertain others, but I don’t know how to be friendly to myself.
In my spare time, what I usually do is watching the boring TV, is watching tv really fun?? so why do you do that? for relaxing, how about doing something else, like playing piano or just sleeping?
sleeping is much better. I need to have more time to sleep. I definitely need more time to sleep, then do some exercise. or what american tv show instead of boring cbinese drama. DO it and not only just claim you will do it. go
Hi, readers,
I just found the function of linking the word 2010 to worldpress, seems that it works..
Now I can blog from my most familiar word processing software, does it sound cool>
先谢谢那些送了祝福和没有送祝福的朋友们，心意我领了，其实我也觉得朋友生日是一个蛮tricky的事情，怎么样表达自己的祝福永远挺难的。。我还记得上次就有一个design school的boot camp出的题就是，如何解决朋友生日的问题送祝福的问题。。。。
最了解我的，当然还是我自己，所以还是我自己给自己写点东西，送点东西～～～不麻烦各位了～～
我是一个相当open，喜欢share情绪的人，写日志，发照 片的目的不是炫或者吸引别人的目光这类的，我挺低调，挺享受安静的一个人的生活的~~~当然也有人说过我写了太多不应该写的话，如果浪费好友时间了，我深感道歉，其实我自己也渐渐的把所有东西搬到自己的blog啦~~~~
过去的一年，想想真的像做梦一样，起起落落，有一段时间相当的阴暗，相当的低沉，我都觉得自己快走不出来了。。。我还记得，春天的时候， 我天天白天躺在床上不起来，晚上穿着黑色的运动衣，在校园走来走去。。想了挺多，想了挺远，想了很深，也想明白了很多，决定放弃一些东西，也放过自己。。
过了那段时间，还明白人生最重要的，果然还是know yourself and accept yourself.. 以前总是特别在意别人的观点，有什么人不喜欢自己，就觉得肯定是自己哪里做不好，有什么事情做不好就很内疚，觉得肯定是自己哪里不足。 恨不得自己是一个百项全能再加上脾气超好，让人人都觉得好。后来越来越觉得，每个人都有自己的strength也有自己的个性，而且也有自己的limit,有些事情真的是你尽全力也做不成的。。。 没有不好，只有不同而已。放弃一些自己不行的地方，做好自己能力范围内能做好的，就不错了。 的确，Stanford里我见了太多太多太优秀的女生，集漂亮，气质，聪明，贤惠，文艺于一体，优秀到让我觉得简直不是人的地步，我连她们的10％也不到，一下子压力超大。。也有很多人天天跟你说，你看看＊＊＊， 唉， 现在觉得，本来就是不同的人种，本来就不在一个档次上，哈哈，只要见到自己每天都在做点事情，在思考问题，我就很开心～～～～～
我本来就是一个普通人，我爸妈也从来不指望我成为什么什么的，也从不拿“别人家的小孩子”跟我比，我想干什么就干什么。。不过现在是觉得自己缺少了很多的教养，缺少了很多应该有的基本的品德，最近在听一系列讲etiquette的课程，感受最深的就是一句，when you have a choice of being right or being kind, always choose to be kind. 我想我也应该注意一下我对人对事的态度， 跟人说话的时候要正视对方，好好听他在讲什么，不主动打断， 不乱给意见等等等等========
最近最受启发的一句话就是 small things count. 以前自己太粗线条了，太不注意细节了，可是现在的社会速度这么快，没有人会花时间来细细的研究来了解你的。还记得今年问一个男生为什么对我的印象这么有偏差，他说了他第一次见我的一件小事，我当时就惊了一下，原来这么小的细节也会给人这样的误解。。。。好吧。。然后最后在一直在法学院图书馆，也发现了一个小细节，就是去经济学院，法学院的洗手间，他们都有全身的镜子，只有engineering的地方从来没见过。。这点可以看出我们对自己的仪表之类的，多么的不注重 啊。。。。。希望以后自己能精致整洁一点，文明 礼貌 一点。。
对末来的自己吧，以前写new year resolution, 总会写，要完全什么什么的目标，现在的想法更偏向于一些小的事情。。。。
所以我不会给下一年订一些目标，只是希望改掉一些不好的习惯～～～
比如
一篇paper还没看完时，绝对不开facebook, youtube，校内………..
早上起来做5分钟yoga~~记得一定吃维生素片，蛋白粉，Q10~～～～
吃饭之前喝一杯水，而不是喝可乐。。。。。。
在白天绝不喝酒～～～晚上不小心喝多了不要乱跟人说话>_<
晚上睡觉前记得要关灯。。。。
看到邮件能回的马上回复。。
见人微笑
不说脏话
每天离开office,把书理干净～～
起床要叠被子>_<
图书馆借了书，要记得看，看完要记得还。。。。。。。。。
工作的时候把gtalk 设成busy!!!!!!!
每两周拿到paycheck,写200个字的 work report, 问问自己是不是值这个钱。。
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写完我自己也乐了。。感觉一点不像一个成年的人，像是教一个7岁的小孩子。。。。不禁想问自己，这么多年了，为什么这点基本的都做不到，也没有意识到？？ 狂汗。。。。。永远记住一点，先做人再做事，先做一个善良正直有教养的人~~~
最后再谢谢我的母校，复旦大学，谢谢那里的老师，学者，现在还会想起教我高数的老师，教我大物的老师，教模电的王老师坐在那里帮我插电路，金老师早上7点不到就来工作的脚步。。。。就像以前老师们说的一样，教师的目的就是在学生的脑子里插种，希望有一天他们能明白。 很多事情 当时不明白，现在一点点清晰起来。。
再谢谢Stanford, 真的是一个wonderful place, 真的是一个以education 和contribution 为宗旨的地方。 今年有一段时间我很自责，每次拿到工资 就觉得我不配呆在学校里，我不配呆在stanford，浪费社会的资源啊。后来认识了一个civil engineering的学生，他是这里的phd, 我问他为什么来读，他说是为了他们town旁边 的一个水坝之类的，想学完去好好建那个水坝。我当时就突然明白过来了，Stanford收学生，不是希望学生一个个都成为伟大的建筑师，为一些有钱人建房子，也希望培养不同工作阶层的人，让他们去更好的完善他们的工作。 以前我爸爸老是希望我读北大，因为我爸爸当时读小学的时候，小学上下课敲钟的，就是一个北大的毕业生（因为某些政治原因下放），然后他说从来没有见过一个人敲钟这么认真，这么准时的。。。。这大概就是高等学府的魅力了吧~~~我希望我也能好好的注重 自己的品德，以后哪怕是种红薯，也有人能看出来我是接受过世界上最好学校教育的人。。。
Hi, readers:
I just finished my one week crash course on design thinking, I am so glad I took it by random and it works like magic for me!!
For all these years’ education, professors and teachers have taught us tons of knowledge and skills, but none of them ever mention another thing —-happiness.
I blame it on them. I always feel unhappy and constantly under pressure. So the magic this course work is not like give your a prescription to solve your problem, but give you a way to solve it. More like the general approach you can use when having problems
It is a course designed to integrate your stanford experience provide you tools or framework
build your world view and
the prescription is ——–design thinking
here is the famous conscious and competence chart. So to make it to the final and optimal state, we need first be conscious about it~~
2. Emphasize
3 Define
4 Ideate
5 Prototype
6 Test
the design thinking is more about reframe the problem, curiosity, bias towards action, radical collaboration, mindful of process etc
The thing resonates me most is while we are asked to take the marshmallow task,
guess the result who do best and who do worst in this challenge?
MBA do worst, because they just argue a lot before they take the action. and just do one prototype.
However, kids do the best. They never talk and vote for ideas, they just try and succeed.
what it tell me is simple —Bias towards actions!!
Another thing works like magic to me is the worldview and workview.
the idea that Work is life, not for the paycheck, and the notion of work -like balance is just wrong!!
For the world view, the infinite game idea really struck me. Because the life is definitely an infinite game, aiming too much on the results is totally meaningless. You should enjoy the process instead of just playing obeying the rules and aiming at winning.
Work and world view help me to figure out how to coherently connect all these parts of making the most out of there.
The last important part is ———FLOW~
what is happiness? happiness is the feeling you are on the flow , the feeling of flourishing. To enjoy the authentic happiness, the key elements are meaningful life
engaged life.
So instead of doing something boring and without any challenge, to find the flow moment, I really need to do something interesting and challenging.
My strength Quest
Restorative
Input
context
Harmony
Intellection
Another thing is bias towards actions.
after reading the book, I totally agree that I am a perfectionist, not a. optimalist
the tendency of a perfectionist is that he thinks failure is unforgivable, and people have the power of avoid failure, and the best path is always a straight line,
the consequence of perfectionism is susceptibility to a whole range of disorders, problems and challenges associated with perfectionism. These include low self-esteem, eating disorders, sexual dysfunction, depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, psychosomatic disorder, a paralyzing tendency to procrastination and serious difficulties in relationships.
first is low self-esteem, since the perfectionist always are far more likely to dwell on their failure than on their success. if one fail frequently, it means that they try frequently, it is only from the experience of challenging ourselves that we learn and grow, and we often develop and mature much more from our failures than from our success.
perfectionist, sustaining this sort of effort can be extremely difficult, the perfectionist’s obsession with the destination and her ability to enjoy the journey eventually saps her desire and motivation, so that she is less likely to put in the hard work necessary for success.
No matter how motivated she may be at the beginning, the strain of sustaining effort for long period of time eventually becomes intolerable if the process is unhappy,
the 80/20 rule
20 percent of the time can be used to accomplish 80% of the work need to be done, so basically, just teach us how to use time efficiently
first of all, college is not the best time of your life..
you are not so suck, the life would be better later on
but this view is not right,
there are three work orientation, a job, a career and a calling,
working——work is not just for a pay check at the end of the week
a career, you mark your achievement through money but also through advancement,
a calling is a passionate commitment to work for its own sake, individuals with a calling see their work as contributing to the greater good, to something larger than they are.
so the question is how to transform a work to a calling,
, you should re craft your work into a calling, something,
but the problem is how? engage your signature strength.
freedom of choice.
Hi, readers,
it seems that I have been back from chicago for more than 5 days, but still have a hard time to get back to real life.
the vacation is great~~ I really love the city, except some neighborhoods full of low class black people,
overall it is metropolitan, which means skyline, shopping mall, tourists and lots of people, but I love big city and I love living in big city
it is so fun and so convenient, everything concentrate together, walking out of the office, you can go to buy high end clothes and handbags,
you can watch the best shows, drinking various coffee and doing some other stuff.
anyway, after back, I went on my regular life, but it is a mess life need refleshing
first of all, every day when I wake up, I should have a shower, need news and have a cup of coffee, instead of random eating, do some exercise first!!!please
so I should prepare for the next day’s coffee, instead of wonder around
it is working time after I got to the office, so don’t mess around the internet,
anyway, I still find it is quite hard to break the old habit, and today, I found myself in a situation of envy again, it is totally tough for me to stop showing envious to beautiful and successful girls when I came across them in the street
so we all know that envy or jealous coming from the low self-esteem, how to overcome it ? there is no meaning to comparison, compare you to others is just like comparing apple to orange, why doing that?
how about focus on yourself and build self-esteem? I am the way I am now, and I should happy that I have already accomplished so much
but there is still room for improvement, just keep on trying, keep in mind that there are always people who are better then you anyway, just keep doing and never be frustrated by them, you are friends not competitors.
Welcome to ME 